The Shanks may have attained the family of their dreams, but they are not going to let go of their other dream — to foster children. The first foster child they took in as a new family was a 14-year-old boy who was a victim of truly unfortunate circumstances.
Her goal is reunification, in most cases. She says her thinking has changed from simply fostering kids to saying that she is doing her part to foster love and connection between each child and their parents. She feels like she is the parent’s cheerleader to reunite with his or her child. Benefits include less stress for the child, better relationships within the family, and a closer connection with the birth parents.
The Shanks
One of the first things the family celebrated was the boys’ new last name. With a sign, the boys commemorated the event. Sara posted that she had shared her heart and home with them for 947 days. But as of August 13, 2018, she gets to share her last name with them. The Shank family now included two adorable sons.
Everyone agreed that Dayshawn and Michael Shank had a nice ring to them. Dayshawn went a step further and chose a new middle name for himself. Sara said that he defies every stereotype of a teenage boy, so, when he chose the middle name “Star,” she felt it fit him perfectly.
Chosen. Loved. Adopted.
Though Sara and Stuart are strong advocates for reunification, their case landed in adoption. Sara said reunification was not possible in this situation. It turned out for the best. The boys were both so happy to be with the Shanks, and the Shanks were elated to call them their sons. They are thrilled about the boys’ future and being there for them.
Sara said that there is less than a 3% chance that teens who leave foster care at age 18 will earn a college degree. With her guidance, these boys have a good chance. Already, Dayshawn says he wants to be a basketball player, a doctor, or a social worker when he gets older.
The Shank’s Commitment to Foster Care
The couple remains strong advocates for foster care. In fact, they are dedicating their assistance to helping children who are most in need. Sara wrote that they began only fostering teens who had been victims of severe crimes and LGBTQ+ youth.
Extra training was required, but they felt it was important as these two segments are the most neglected within the foster system. On the “Love What Matters” blog, Sara wrote that it is heartbreaking that these demographics of teens sit in social workers’ offices or shelters for weeks (or even months) on end since so few homes are open to them.
Happily, Ever After
Sara and Stuart love what they are doing in their lives, and they want to keep on giving. They would like to open up their house as a specialized home for LGBTQ+ youth, teen moms, or teens who survived trafficking, wherever there is the most need. Sara implores others to be aware of the great need for foster homes. She confirms that there are thousands upon thousands of incredible kids out there needing people who will care for them and love them.
From her experience, she says that people interested in fostering shouldn't be concerned that they need to be the 'perfect' parent. Every parent makes mistakes or speaks out of turn. But what she ensures is that the kids understand. They know that parents are only human and that the point of a family is to be a team and apologize when necessary. Today Sara is qualified as a trainer for foster parents.