While the Dude has had what many might call a unique career path, everybody can agree that this question is just annoying. The only people that think about it other than in a job interview are those annoying super career-focused bros or lady bosses that you try not to follow on LinkedIn because they’re the only ones that post.
Most of us don’t care where we are in five years, as long as it’s in a comfortable home surrounded by loved ones. Maybe it will be at this company, maybe another company. Who knows. Can we get back to my resume?
Just Throw Them Away!
The garbage can is right there! You're just creating more work for yourself in the future. Yes, maybe you can sometimes get a little bit out of the jar of jam or whatever is hiding in the back of the fridge, but most of the time, it's more trouble than it's worth. Rinse them out, replace the cap, and put them in the garbage or recycle them.
Your fridge will have more space for actual food, it will probably smell a little nicer, and you'll feel better about your cleanliness. Here's the rule – if you have to scrape around the edges to get any little morsel, get rid of it once you're done.
Yup, Tastes Like Wine
We're going to be honest – we don't have much experience in this one. Put a glass of wine in front of us, and we might take a sip or two, but it's just not the sort of thing we like to drink. If you're being asked to choose a wine for everybody, you might have no idea where to start.
Red? White? That weird pink version that has become so popular for no reason you can figure out? Apparently, there are notes of elements that can get into wine, but it all just tastes like vinegar to us. Have someone else pick the wine.
Sorry if We Don't Want a Dessert for Breakfast
There are lots of ways to spruce up your normal morning drink. You can add classics like cream or sugar, or you could go all out and get something that is just an ice cream shake with caffeine when you think about it. On the other hand, there are lots of people that take their coffee black – as God intended.
These people often have a little bit of a superiority complex and might loudly flaunt their coffee drink of choice. This can annoy people who want something a little special, as the Dude's sign tells us. We mean, what's wrong with a tall, skimmed hazelnut frappuccino?
Maintain Six Feet at All Times
There are a lot of people out there that need some physical contact. For some people, it's their actual love language, and a friendly hand on theirs or a small touch on the shoulder can mean a lot more than you think. However, to some people, being touched by another is like poison in their veins.
The idea of having someone come up and wrap them in a hug without the proper prep time is like a nightmare. Yes, those people might need to get over themselves a little bit, but this sign is much punchier. We don't want to be hugged. Thank you!