We love Rotten Tomatoes for its brutal honesty. The synopsis begins: “Kewpie-doll voiced Melanie Griffith does a sexed-up Nancy Drew turn in David Seltzer’s adaptation of Susan Isaac’s novel Shining Through.” R-rated, for Razzie, the film took the top prize in 1992. Even with a saucy Melanie Griffith and the handsome Michael Douglas, the film sees a somewhat predictably “unpredictable” story set in the years of World War II. Yawn.
We weren’t the only ones who thought it either. The most disappointing part about this film was the fact that it had the potential to be something great – if it had remained true to the novel. Focusing more on the sex appeal than the script, this film’s Razzie was well deserved.
1994: Color Of The Night
We feel that Color of the Night was an attempt at redeeming Bruce Willis from his Hudson Hawk days and painting him as not only an action star but a bit of a sex symbol too. Sure, the storyline and characters are at best troubled, but this thriller-mystery film just seems to miss the mark. As a result, it was awarded the Golden Raspberry for 1994.
Despite not being the best film, it still has its lure, for obvious reasons. Jonathan Rosenbaum of Chicago Reader gives us a nice summary: “the plot gets so convoluted and farfetched that you still may be scratching your head after the denouement, but you probably won’t be bored.”
1993: Indecent Proposal
Despite being a huge box office hit, bringing in almost $270 million, the film was just morally wrong, and even a bit disturbing. Based on the novel of the same name, this drama was about a newly married couple’s relationship and how they dealt with a real-life test of their loyalty for each other. The test was Robert Redford (who was almost in dirty old man territory by the early 90s) offering newlywed Demi Moore $1 million to spend the night with him.
As you can imagine, feminists and respectable human beings alike didn’t really take to the idea that Demi Moore’s character could be so easily bought. Critics and Razzie award-givers just couldn’t understand the appeal to this film, but we get why audiences loved it. Surely it was a great dinner conversation starter – "would you do it? For a million dollars? A million!"
1991: Hudson Hawk
Everyone’s favorite action hero, Bruce Willis showed us, exactly why he’s an action hero and not a comedy star. Even though later on, in films like Cop Out, it seems he eventually found the world’s funny bone. Anyway, back to the steaming mess that was Hudson Hawk, sure, the premise seems entertaining: former jailbird is released from prison, just wants a good cappuccino before – oops, let’s do a few heists!
The “comedy” ensues from that point on. Yeah, go figure. In a somewhat ironic twist, the film was released just after Die Hard 2, so fans expected an action blockbuster. Boy, they must have felt they were in the wrong cinema when Hudson Hawk started! With a sizeable budget of $65 million US, the film bombed, taking only $17 million at the box office. No one was yippee ki-yay-ing, that’s for sure!
1990: Ghosts Can't Do It
We thought Bolero was bad, but it seems that John Derek just can’t stay away from producing bad films. Again, another film about sex from an equally perturbed place. IMDb’s synopsis says it all: “Elderly Scott kills himself after a heart attack wrecks his body, but then comes back as a ghost and convinces his loving young hot wife Kate to pick and kill a young man in order for Scott to possess his body and be with her again.” If that isn’t enough to turn your stomach, then you’re on your own!
So, an old pervert is with a hot young bird who apparently loves him, he kills himself because you know, he can’t “do it” anymore and can’t “enjoy” his young wife. One second, a bit of projectile vomiting coming up. Do we have to continue? This film is cringing enough.