While we aren’t surprised that Chislic comes from South Dakota, we are still disappointed. Basically, it’s greasy dice-sized chunks of meat on toothpicks. That’s about all that they are. And somehow, it’s a regional delicacy.
Sorry, I don’t know why I said it somehow. Considering that it’s from South Dakota, it makes perfect sense.
Rhode Island -- Stuffed Quahogs
Stuffed clams aren't the worst thing in the world, but visually they basically look like you threw up into a clam and decided to call it food. You can basically get a whiff of it just from looking. It's like a stare n' sniff. If it's true you eat with your eyes, now I wish I was blind.
Stuffed clams are very popular in Rode Island. They consist of a breadcrumb and minced clam mixture that is baked on the half shell of a quahog hard shell clam. Other ingredients that may be found in the breadcrumb mixture are meat, chili pepper, lemon juice, bell peppers, celery, onion, garlic, and spices. I'm sure you're already looking for flights to Rhode Island.
South Carolina -- Fried Pig Ears
America loves pork and for good reason. There are many delicious parts of a pig that can be turned into a stunning dish. But who in the world looked at a pig's ears and thought that it would be a nice idea to deep fry them? That's literally disgusting.
We want to love South Carolina for giving us shrimp and grits, but this kind of sours things for us.
Tennessee -- Chitterlings
First of all, if they're pronounced "chitlins," why would you spell it like that? While you might be confused by the name, what it actually is will confuse you even more.
There's nothing so wrong about eating intestines considering that most of us are eating hot dogs on the reg, but there's something so unfortunate about a dish that actually looks like intestines. Like, at least disguise them to look like something else. People in Tennessee must not have Instagram.
Texas -- Frito Pie
We have absolutely nothing against Fritos. They are perfectly salty and a great chip for some dip. But, Texans like to act like their state is a bastion of haute cuisine. Austinites in particular will poo-poo a taco from literally anywhere but Austin. So, we'd like to take the time to so graciously remind them that they've also given us the wild Frito pie.
It's basically a casserole made with processed corn chips. And there you have it. That's all it is. We're just a bit surprised that it originates in Texas and not Missouri, to be honest. We did have higher hopes for Texas.