Some messages on hoodies just capture the essence of the person wearing them. And in Walmart, you a bound to learn a lot about the clientele simply based on what it says on their apparel. This guy simply couldn’t help himself. Sure a white hoodie is nothing to write home about.
But the message on the back of it…sure, it rhymes. But it is so crude that we need to censor the final word. We’ll let you use your imagination to figure out what it says. Just don’t start reading it out loud if you see him on the streets.
The New Plague Doctor
Back in the day, when there were terrible pandemics like the Black Death, there was a certain figure called the Plague Doctor. This person would walk around the neighborhoods, trying to attend to people in need. But their most distinctive characteristic was the long, scary-looking mask they would wear.
It was designed in a way to prevent them from inhaling any traces of the bubonic plague, while also having enough air to breathe inside it. They would also have garlic hanging from them, to combat terrible smells. It seems like this guy tried to bring the mask back into fashion during the most recent pandemic. And he wore it in Walmart, of all places.
All Twerk No Play
We assume that the sign at this entrance is referring to the music festival Bonnaroo. This Tennessee event sees thousands upon thousands of music fans flock from all over the country for some fantastic performances. But one popular destination for these fans has to be Walmart. After all, you need all of the bare essentials to be well prepared for your time at the "Roo."
These two ladies appear to be wearing the appropriate uniform for the festival. One of them even seems to be displaying a typical movement that is common now in this corner of the animal kingdom. We believe it's called "twerking."
Filled to the Brim
It's not entirely clear how this car got into such a terrible state. All we know is that it was spotted in a parking lot in Walmart. But we have no idea whether the copious amount of items inside the vehicle were recently bought from Walmart, or if the car was already a huge mess. Whatever the case may be, they definitely don't have enough room to store everything.
Hence why the trunk door is wide open. This guy needs to drive slowly all the way home, just to make sure that nothing falls out. The question is, does he even have room to put his feet on the peddles and steer the car? Or to even sit?
Not the Ideal Place for a Self-Pedicure
While Walmart is primarily a place where people shop, it seems like people use this superstore for many other purposes. Some use it as a place to hang out with friends. Some use it to commit petty crimes. Some use it as a way to exercise (big it's huge). But we don't think we've ever seen someone use a counter in Walmart as a place to sit, until now.
Not only is that guy having a well-earned rest after walking around the store for a few hours, but he also seems to be doing some self-maintenance, specifically on his foot. If this isn't a recipe for a health and safety lawsuit, we don't know what is.